I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
