Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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