no, he came in my armpit
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
