I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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