Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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