I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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