question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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