Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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