Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
