Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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