i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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