dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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