I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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