Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Randomize
