I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
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