Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
