Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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