you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
