I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
