you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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