New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
