we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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