Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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