he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
