If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
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there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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