im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I have fence marks all over my body
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
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