Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
