if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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