Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
