I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
