Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
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Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
How external is "for external use only"?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
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we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
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