Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
