she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
