I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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