i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
