im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
