College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
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Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
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I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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