I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize
