I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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