WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
