porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
