I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
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