Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
