these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize