i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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