Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
