You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
You ate ashes out of my bong
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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