Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true

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(843): Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true http://tfl.nu/y8hf

Replies (413) Good night (105524) Bad night (10185)
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(742): View more from

What happened last night?

(1-742): View more from

You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.

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(742): What happened last night? (1-742): You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth. http://tfl.nu/koqa

Replies (5) Good night (953) Bad night (4966)
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(713): View more from Texas

I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.

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(713): I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke. http://tfl.nu/gwfs

Replies (14) Good night (5211) Bad night (850)
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(914): View more from New York

you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped

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(914): you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped http://tfl.nu/cz84

Replies (23) Good night (7043) Bad night (1166)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.

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(505): I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat. http://tfl.nu/2tx3

Replies (14) Good night (4074) Bad night (1416)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.

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(+44): I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating. http://tfl.nu/brik

Replies (8) Good night (1259) Bad night (2682)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.

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(306): I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park. http://tfl.nu/fvsb

Replies (5) Good night (3530) Bad night (998)
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(206): View more from Washington

AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!

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(206): AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN! http://tfl.nu/o93p

Replies (4) Good night (1034) Bad night (1735)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis

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(402): Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis http://tfl.nu/hhal

Replies (12) Good night (802) Bad night (1228)
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(641): View more from Iowa

FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.

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(641): FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS. http://tfl.nu/fecm

Replies (6) Good night (2117) Bad night (1142)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?

(732): View more from New Jersey

No, I did. It's a long story.

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(484): Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that? (732): No, I did. It's a long story. http://tfl.nu/j226

Replies (2) Good night (1656) Bad night (693)
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(229): View more from Georgia

It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.

(904): View more from Florida

Keeping it classy as usual I see

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(229): It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back. (904): Keeping it classy as usual I see http://tfl.nu/9n6z

Replies (3) Good night (1596) Bad night (730)
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(513): View more from Ohio

well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them

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(513): well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them http://tfl.nu/2ptj

Replies (1) Good night (396) Bad night (714)
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(949): View more from California

Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.

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(949): Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows. http://tfl.nu/xhmr

Replies (2) Good night (543) Bad night (492)
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(415): View more from California

She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car

(831): View more from California

Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU

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(415): She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car (831): Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU http://tfl.nu/qj3f

Replies (0) Good night (634) Bad night (379)

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