Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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