that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
