I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize